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Hello! My name is Jamie Martin. I'm a pre-vet student in Phoenix, I'm pretty jawsome.

08/05/2008

Funny metaphors used in high school essays

onemoretimewithfeeling:

“From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.”

jackieheartsb:

I LOL’d at no. 19:

Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

ali-with-an-i:

This is worth a look.

My personal favourite: 7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

My favorite: “John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.”

Link posted at 10:12pm / 106 notes

  1. mikeyllorin reblogged this from kayfabe
  2. jakec reblogged this from aidenpyne and added:
    HALF OF THESE ARE SIMILES. HOW DID THESE “TEACHERS” GRADUATE?
  3. onbeauty reblogged this from yourpalmal and added:
    This is awesome. And my favorite is: 17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the East River.
  4. notsharon reblogged this from livejamie and added:
    a deep, throaty, genuine laugh,...that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.”
  5. thepeacoat reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  6. moneyissues reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
  7. sraz reblogged this from livejamie and added:
    ohmy, this is hilarious!
  8. tyce reblogged this from livejamie
  9. urbanpringle reblogged this from dallasw and added:
    Yeah. we got that. help.com didn’t.
  10. dallasw reblogged this from urbanpringle and added:
    are all similes!
  11. arshdeep reblogged this from into-deactivated20080926
  12. badwobot reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  13. percepto reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    faves are #11 and #19 - priceless.
  14. myfirstsodabread reblogged this from hugehuge and added:
    I like 19: Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
  15. hugehuge reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  16. urbanpringle reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    These students are pretty darn creative actually. If I were...teacher these submissions...
  17. justfeisty reblogged this from libbylovesnyc
  18. aidenpyne reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    Fav is: 6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever.
  19. mandymaggs17 reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    Number 3 had me in hysterics!
  20. heylookathatree reblogged this from shannern and added:
    um, i have no words. only tons of laughter.
  21. vulturepiano reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    I prefer: She grew on him like she...colony of E. coli, and he was room temperature...
  22. meghangrace reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    These are similes, not metaphors, but still funny.
  23. brainindustries reblogged this from livejamie and added:
    I love them all, but my two favorites were: Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the...
  24. culby reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    (Hat Tip: ali-with-an-i and the Radar)
  25. jamiea reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    I love number 11: “From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when...
  26. theandrewbrown reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  27. rainbowhill reblogged this from livejamie and added:
    I really hate to rain pedantically on your parade but, bar one, these are all examples of simile. You know, I never met...
  28. spacelola reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  29. libbylovesnyc reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
  30. baronvoncrunk reblogged this from ohthehumanity and added:
    Amazing. Especially the Jeopardy one.
  31. andrewglennflavin reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  32. corcoranm reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  33. amilniazi reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    I hope everyone’s getting the message here, which...kids are stupid.
  34. ricochet reblogged this from into-deactivated20080926 and added:
    haha no. 19:Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
  35. iichlits reblogged this from clablr and added:
    colony of E. coli, and he was room temperature Canadian beef.”
  36. misterpeace reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    Thank you for posting that. That...my laugh-out-loud moment for the day. :) I genuinely...
  37. clablr reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound...dog makes just before it throws up.
  38. johnthomas reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  39. skar reblogged this from brocatus and added:
    What about this one: 25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were
  40. brocatus reblogged this from livejamie and added:
    Forgot to add my own favorite; “The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.”...
  41. bischoff reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    Eine schöne Sammlung von Metaphern, die amerikanische Schüler der High School in ihren Aufsätzen verwendet haben.
  42. weepinangel reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    I love this one right here: 10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like...Hefty...
  43. kim reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    I think I had an email of something like this
  44. verydefinitely reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    faves are no. 4 and 23: 4. She grew on him like she...colony of E. coli, and he was room...
  45. jumpthegunproductions reblogged this from jamiele
  46. souvenirs reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    One of my favorites: 6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever.
  47. ieatyouruterus reblogged this from mojopin and added:
    hahahaha i love this nikita x]
  48. agsystems reblogged this from livejamie and added:
    “Funny metaphors similies used in high school essays” 12. Her hair glistened in the rain
  49. bbbrad reblogged this from livejamie
  50. looeeesuh reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  51. princessnikita reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  52. mojopin reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like...guy who went blind...
  53. jamiele reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  54. mewithoutyou reblogged this from into-deactivated20080926 and added:
    favourite is #17:
  55. hellointernet reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever.
  56. baotran reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    these are hilarious
  57. restlessruminations reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    These made me smile. Several of them are quite clever, albeit silly.
  58. tneilen reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  59. kayfabe reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
  60. somageek reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  61. hoja reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  62. shannern reblogged this from livejamie and added:
    I’m SO using these this year. What will I get in trouble for more: bad metaphors or plagiarizing?
  63. areid reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    Metaphors I plan to use in daily conversation....favorite is number 11: “From the attic...
  64. livejamie reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:
    My favorite: “John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.”
  65. crowned reblogged this from into-deactivated20080926
  66. latentcontent reblogged this from into-deactivated20080926
  67. pwnedbylorna reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    I read all this before sometime ago, but I still like them. I love great analogies.
  68. okayjokesover reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like...guy who went blind...
  69. markyb reblogged this from superdoofus-stratodrive and added:
    22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from...
  70. superdoofus-stratodrive reblogged this from whatson and added:
    after reading that list it looks like palahniuk’s new noir novel is writing itself! missing as of yet: the factoids he...
  71. tleslieb reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    Anna… you need to read these.. it will crack you up. Yes I know that I just singled out one reader, but I know she will...
  72. rorymarinich-deactivated2009061 reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  73. whatson reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  74. heh reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
  75. luap reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    favorite by far: 6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever. Which reminds me of the...
  76. amandawantsacookie reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound...dog makes just before it throws up. that’s...
  77. ohthehumanity reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    laughing so hard I cried.
  78. ashhol reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    lol 20. The plan...simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just...
  79. noahkai reblogged this from shimmerandshine-deactivated2009
  80. dangbooty reblogged this from jlovely and added:
    I believe these are called similies. Still, they gave me a smile when reading them, though.
  81. chelynne reblogged this from alilbit and added:
    I love this. Heeheehee!
  82. dazzlingdelta reblogged this from katysaidso and added:
    holy crap im going to love reading this
  83. katysaidso reblogged this from jlovely and added:
    I LOL’d at no. 12, “Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.”
  84. jlovely reblogged this from missbrightside and added:
    “25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.”
  85. rackattack reblogged this from jona
  86. alilbit reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
  87. setuplikeadeckofcards reblogged this from chimp-shitbitch-kittenscrazy and added:
    My favourite is No. 11. It’s funny, but it’s also pretty expressive. I know exactly what they mean: “The whole scene had...
  88. chimp-shitbitch-kittenscrazy reblogged this from jackieheartsb
  89. erinshannon reblogged this from missbrightside
  90. missbrightside reblogged this from jackieheartsb and added:
    “Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.” LOL.
  91. arod reblogged this from shimmerandshine-deactivated2009 and added:
    she was the East River.” “He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience,
  92. transformersandnails reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:
    Oh, Phil. 20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
  93. bmiller reblogged this from jackieheartsb and added:
    I will go with No. 14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each...
  94. allisonandgeoffrey reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:
    Love this one - super romantic: She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it...
  95. furth reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
  96. theipodguru reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
  97. cwags reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:
    My favorite is Mr. Literal #3: He spoke with...wisdom that can only come from...
  98. jona reblogged this from jackieheartsb and added:
    Thank you for the nice, hearty laugh this morning. A laugh so hearty, it was almost as if it came out of a Campbell’s...
  99. yourpalmal reblogged this from jackieheartsb and added:
    My favorite was #3: He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he...
  100. lrusso reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
  101. bensley reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    Haha great stuff! Actually makes me feel like writing
  102. smartblonde reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:
    16. “John and Mary...never met. They were...two hummingbirds...
  103. onemoretimewithfeeling reblogged this from jackieheartsb and added:
    “From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in...
  104. gmayfair reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    HA! 20. The plan...simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just...
  105. jackieheartsb reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
    I LOL’d at no. 19: Shots rang out,...shots are wont to do.
  106. ali-with-an-i posted this
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