Jamie Martin | Funny metaphors used in high school essays

mikeyllorin reblogged this from kayfabe

jakec reblogged this from aidenpyne and added:

HALF OF THESE ARE SIMILES. HOW DID THESE “TEACHERS” GRADUATE?

notsharon reblogged this from livejamie and added:

a deep, throaty, genuine laugh,...that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.”

thepeacoat reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

moneyissues reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling

sraz reblogged this from livejamie and added:

ohmy, this is hilarious!

tyce reblogged this from livejamie

urbanpringle reblogged this from dallasw and added:

Yeah. we got that. help.com didn’t.

dallasw reblogged this from urbanpringle and added:

are all similes!

badwobot reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

percepto reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

faves are #11 and #19 - priceless.

myfirstsodabread reblogged this from hugehuge and added:

I like 19: Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

hugehuge reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

urbanpringle reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

These students are pretty darn creative actually. If I were...teacher these submissions...

justfeisty reblogged this from libbylovesnyc

aidenpyne reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

Fav is: 6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever.

amandemic reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

Number 3 had me in hysterics!

heylookathatree reblogged this from shannern and added:

um, i have no words. only tons of laughter.

vulturepiano reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

I prefer: She grew on him like she...colony of E. coli, and he was room temperature...

meghangrace reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

These are similes, not metaphors, but still funny.

ruaarnold reblogged this from livejamie and added:

I love them all, but my two favorites were: Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the...

culby reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

(Hat Tip: ali-with-an-i and the Radar)

jamiea reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

I love number 11: “From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when...

theandrewbrown reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

rainbowhill reblogged this from livejamie and added:

I really hate to rain pedantically on your parade but, bar one, these are all examples of simile. You know, I never met...

libbylovesnyc reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

andrewglennflavin reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

corcoranm reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

amilniazi reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

I hope everyone’s getting the message here, which...kids are stupid.

iichlits reblogged this from clablr and added:

colony of E. coli, and he was room temperature Canadian beef.”

clablr reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound...dog makes just before it throws up.

johnthomas reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

skar reblogged this from brocatus and added:

What about this one: 25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were

brocatus reblogged this from livejamie and added:

Forgot to add my own favorite; “The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.”...

cchausman reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

I love this one right here: 10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like...Hefty...

kim reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

I think I had an email of something like this

verydefinitely reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

faves are no. 4 and 23: 4. She grew on him like she...colony of E. coli, and he was room...

kicksterflixter reblogged this from jamienguyenle

souvenirs reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

One of my favorites: 6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever.

ieatyouruterus reblogged this from oktopussy and added:

hahahaha i love this nikita x]

agsystems reblogged this from livejamie and added:

“Funny metaphors similies used in high school essays” 12. Her hair glistened in the rain

bbbrad reblogged this from livejamie

looznooz reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

nikita-banana reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

oktopussy reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like...guy who went blind...

jamienguyenle reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

hellointernet reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever.

baotran reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

these are hilarious

restlessruminations reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

These made me smile. Several of them are quite clever, albeit silly.

kayfabe reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling

somageek reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

emmiryrai reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

shannern reblogged this from livejamie and added:

I’m SO using these this year. What will I get in trouble for more: bad metaphors or plagiarizing?

areid reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

Metaphors I plan to use in daily conversation....favorite is number 11: “From the attic...

livejamie reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:

My favorite: “John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.”

pwnedbylorna reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

I read all this before sometime ago, but I still like them. I love great analogies.

okayjokesover reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like...guy who went blind...

markyb reblogged this from superdoofus-stratodrive and added:

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from...

superdoofus-stratodrive reblogged this from whatson and added:

after reading that list it looks like palahniuk’s new noir novel is writing itself! missing as of yet: the factoids he...

tleslieb reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

Anna… you need to read these.. it will crack you up. Yes I know that I just singled out one reader, but I know she will...

whatson reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

heh reblogged this from ali-with-an-i

luap reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

favorite by far: 6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever. Which reminds me of the...

ahhmanda reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound...dog makes just before it throws up. that’s...

ohthehumanity reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

laughing so hard I cried.

ashhol reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

lol 20. The plan...simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just...

dangbooty reblogged this from jlovely and added:

I believe these are called similies. Still, they gave me a smile when reading them, though.

chelynne reblogged this from alilbit and added:

I love this. Heeheehee!

dazzlingdelta reblogged this from katysaidso and added:

holy crap im going to love reading this

katysaidso reblogged this from jlovely and added:

I LOL’d at no. 12, “Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.”

jlovely reblogged this from missbrightside and added:

“25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.”

rackattack reblogged this from jona

alilbit reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling

setuplikeadeckofcards reblogged this from chimp-shitbitch-kittenscrazy and added:

My favourite is No. 11. It’s funny, but it’s also pretty expressive. I know exactly what they mean: “The whole scene had...

chimp-shitbitch-kittenscrazy reblogged this from jaclynday

raindelays reblogged this from missbrightside

missbrightside reblogged this from jaclynday and added:

“Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.” LOL.

transformersandnails reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:

Oh, Phil. 20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.

bmiller reblogged this from jaclynday and added:

I will go with No. 14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each...

allisonandgeoffrey reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:

Love this one - super romantic: She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it...

furth reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling

theipodguru reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling

jona reblogged this from jaclynday and added:

Thank you for the nice, hearty laugh this morning. A laugh so hearty, it was almost as if it came out of a Campbell’s...

yourpalmal reblogged this from jaclynday and added:

My favorite was #3: He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he...

lrusso reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling

bensley reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

Haha great stuff! Actually makes me feel like writing

reallykatie reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:

16. “John and Mary...never met. They were...two hummingbirds...

onemoretimewithfeeling reblogged this from jaclynday and added:

“From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in...

gmayfair reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

HA! 20. The plan...simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just...

jaclynday reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:

I LOL’d at no. 19: Shots rang out,...shots are wont to do.

ali-with-an-i posted this